Alright, this fall is flying by, and I feel like days are slipping through my fingers. I wanted to have that second novel written by the end of the semester, but it's starting to look sketchy, so I am going to commit here to a date. Writing will commence Nov 15th, whether or not I'm happy with my editing of Silk, whether or not I'm happy with a laptop...I could spend the next forty years putting my ducks in a row, researching, trying to get 'ready' for the new book and editing the older one. Nope, I'm going to start then, regardless of Thanksgiving. I may tack on an extra 3 days to my writing month to make up for Thanksgiving, so I don't kill my family over the holidays!
Why not today? Why wait? Well, the kids have a lot of days off in the next couple of weeks, and, when they're in school, I'm going to visit some high schools. We went to the open house and got quite enthused about a couple of schools, but Michael wisely suggested that we withhold any decisions until we see the schools in action. I'll go and have tours at three of the schools to get a sense of whether they're places I'm comfortable sending my kids.
Fiona's already settled on Savannah Arts Academy, which I'm thrilled about. She was at the open house yesterday (just accompanying us), and she had her hair in colorful, funky ponytails and braids for 'crazy hair day'. I don't think the SAA counselor realized the special hair day, but she looked at Fiona like she completely belonged at their school and assured her, "We'll be looking forward to having you at SAA!" Fiona will need to pick a major, but she's got years to do that and a host of talents.
I'm going to go ahead and visit SAA during the normal school day with Alex's top two picks--as, if the vibe really is far better there, I'll push him in that direction. Actually, he agreed with that completely, even though he's more interested in the Engineering Program at Jenkins or the International Baccalaureate program at Windsor Forest than in Arts. He's fascinated, at the moment, with filmmaking, though, so the theatre division is attractive to him (and there's a two-year filmmaking course to be offered at Windsor Forest as well). Also, he's got that piano thing going on, so he'll have a specific talent to get into SAA, if we opt that route for him.
Yes, I realize how dull this is for you, but committing to my novel dates here really seems to make a difference. I can easily ask myself for personal commitment reprieves, but when I've publicly stated something, I tend to stick with it a little better. The school chat? Just something to put up with, as you know how obsessive I am (I was the same about picking Ellis--visited a host of schools, from the time he was two!)--and I've never regretted it.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Family Update
I realized just a bit ago that it seems quite a while since I posted any family updates on here. The 'what's up with our little family', so to speak! I suppose that's because, thank goodness, the kids have been pretty smooth sailing.
Alex has a potato soup day tomorrow at school. I know there's a theme--something to do with the Irish potato famine in the mid 1800's. Parents are invited, so it'll be a third nightshade day in a row for me! Believe it or not, I believe I'm feeling warning flares in my finger joints, but it might just be my imagination. Tomorrow might clarify that.
Ms. Carol had a friendship stew a few weeks ago, and Alex wanted me to come to that, too. It's so sweet...the kids each brought ingredients and put it together. Anyhow, it's a sort of community thing that gives me the warm fuzzies. Alex gets quite enthusiastic about it, which I just love. That's the crux of the whole Montessori concept, you know--to involve the kids and keep them enthusiastic.
Alex is having a pretty laid-back year. His knee gave him some problems, and it's still not great, so he's been out of taekwondo for quite a while. His piano skills continue to improve, and we're very thrilled with his progress, though we don't focus on it nearly like we could!
Alex has been reading a bit more lately. He just finished the newest book by the Percy Jackson author. It's also about Greek mythology. He seems to love mythology, even suggesting once that he might become a professor teaching mythology!
We're to go to a High School Day tomorrow evening at Ellis to try to figure out where he wants to go. Yes, it's becoming a bit like college. He's supposed to figure out now where he wants to go so he can get those ducks in a row, though he won't officially apply for two years, I believe!
Gosh, even though he seems very down-to-earth, Alex definitely is a producer of pipe dreams. I only say that because he has a hundred new ideas every day and is completely enthusiastic about them all. I'm sure there's a profession for the idea-generators, isn't there? We couldn't possibly follow through on all those ideas! At breakfast, I'm generally encouraging him to focus on eating, as he'll let the food get cold while he glibly prattles off yet another new set of ideas. He's got a buoyant, optimistic little spirit when it comes to those!
Hmm, speaking of spirits, I believe I've had a bit of a revelation about my children. Alex, like me, can become very intense. High highs, low lows, vitriolic anger! Sweet as pie most of the time :). He's earnest and sincere and not necessarily very socially adept.
Fiona, however, is my more gentle child. She was born with a sense of humor, and she loves to make everyone laugh and smile. She is far more socially adept, and her ideals fall after her love for her friends.
When I recently made up with my best friend, I was so relieved, and Fiona was very happy for me. She asked what had gone wrong, and I answered a bit generally, but she went with it and tried to give me some advice, "Mom, here's what I do. When someone says something I don't agree with, I just say, 'okay, you're right. ' That makes them happy and then we can still be friends."
Alex nearly choked with outrage at her take on things, but I suggested that perhaps we should just hold our tongues, as Fiona has by far the best track record for keeping friendships and getting along with others! Yes, I was a bit concerned by what she said, but I actually think it doesn't mean she would go along with whatever someone else wants to do. She would just not make an issue of it unless she had to. Fiona is very adept at getting her way and working the system!
I've realized that Fiona is an artistic little soul, too. She recently has shown a real interest in poetry, which they're studying in school a bit. She'll memorize verse and repeat it to me, whereas I've never much had an interest in it. She loves her music and art, too, of course.
Fiona always felt a bit troubled by the fact that she wasn't much for breaking boards and showing intensity in taekwondo. She could kick high, which looked nice, but she just didn't have the heart for breaking boards and kicking bags. I've honestly only just realized that she's a poetic, sweet little soul who isn't really meant for that sort of thing. She's meant to create and make things beautiful. Of course, I'd love it if she could defend herself, too, but she's a gentle creature through and through. Oh, yes, she does occasionally whack her brother, though. Not sure how that plays into it!
Michael's a pretty gentle character himself, honestly. Neither of the two of them enjoys violence on television at all, whereas Alex and I seem a bit more tolerant of it.
Michael just brought home another rescue bunny, a soft gray little rabbit named Be-Bop. She's precious. I wasn't thrilled about it, due to those feelings of responsibility and 'How are we ever supposed to have a garden?' Oh well, the garden has only ever been theoretical--maybe because of the animals, who are always in it, or maybe not.
Michael is back to focusing more on his practice again. We are excited about bringing in a new acupuncturist to work with him, and we're hoping things pick up a bit soon. That would be a very good thing to happen in the near future!
Alex has a potato soup day tomorrow at school. I know there's a theme--something to do with the Irish potato famine in the mid 1800's. Parents are invited, so it'll be a third nightshade day in a row for me! Believe it or not, I believe I'm feeling warning flares in my finger joints, but it might just be my imagination. Tomorrow might clarify that.
Ms. Carol had a friendship stew a few weeks ago, and Alex wanted me to come to that, too. It's so sweet...the kids each brought ingredients and put it together. Anyhow, it's a sort of community thing that gives me the warm fuzzies. Alex gets quite enthusiastic about it, which I just love. That's the crux of the whole Montessori concept, you know--to involve the kids and keep them enthusiastic.
Alex is having a pretty laid-back year. His knee gave him some problems, and it's still not great, so he's been out of taekwondo for quite a while. His piano skills continue to improve, and we're very thrilled with his progress, though we don't focus on it nearly like we could!
Alex has been reading a bit more lately. He just finished the newest book by the Percy Jackson author. It's also about Greek mythology. He seems to love mythology, even suggesting once that he might become a professor teaching mythology!
We're to go to a High School Day tomorrow evening at Ellis to try to figure out where he wants to go. Yes, it's becoming a bit like college. He's supposed to figure out now where he wants to go so he can get those ducks in a row, though he won't officially apply for two years, I believe!
Gosh, even though he seems very down-to-earth, Alex definitely is a producer of pipe dreams. I only say that because he has a hundred new ideas every day and is completely enthusiastic about them all. I'm sure there's a profession for the idea-generators, isn't there? We couldn't possibly follow through on all those ideas! At breakfast, I'm generally encouraging him to focus on eating, as he'll let the food get cold while he glibly prattles off yet another new set of ideas. He's got a buoyant, optimistic little spirit when it comes to those!
Hmm, speaking of spirits, I believe I've had a bit of a revelation about my children. Alex, like me, can become very intense. High highs, low lows, vitriolic anger! Sweet as pie most of the time :). He's earnest and sincere and not necessarily very socially adept.
Fiona, however, is my more gentle child. She was born with a sense of humor, and she loves to make everyone laugh and smile. She is far more socially adept, and her ideals fall after her love for her friends.
When I recently made up with my best friend, I was so relieved, and Fiona was very happy for me. She asked what had gone wrong, and I answered a bit generally, but she went with it and tried to give me some advice, "Mom, here's what I do. When someone says something I don't agree with, I just say, 'okay, you're right. ' That makes them happy and then we can still be friends."
Alex nearly choked with outrage at her take on things, but I suggested that perhaps we should just hold our tongues, as Fiona has by far the best track record for keeping friendships and getting along with others! Yes, I was a bit concerned by what she said, but I actually think it doesn't mean she would go along with whatever someone else wants to do. She would just not make an issue of it unless she had to. Fiona is very adept at getting her way and working the system!
I've realized that Fiona is an artistic little soul, too. She recently has shown a real interest in poetry, which they're studying in school a bit. She'll memorize verse and repeat it to me, whereas I've never much had an interest in it. She loves her music and art, too, of course.
Fiona always felt a bit troubled by the fact that she wasn't much for breaking boards and showing intensity in taekwondo. She could kick high, which looked nice, but she just didn't have the heart for breaking boards and kicking bags. I've honestly only just realized that she's a poetic, sweet little soul who isn't really meant for that sort of thing. She's meant to create and make things beautiful. Of course, I'd love it if she could defend herself, too, but she's a gentle creature through and through. Oh, yes, she does occasionally whack her brother, though. Not sure how that plays into it!
Michael's a pretty gentle character himself, honestly. Neither of the two of them enjoys violence on television at all, whereas Alex and I seem a bit more tolerant of it.
Michael just brought home another rescue bunny, a soft gray little rabbit named Be-Bop. She's precious. I wasn't thrilled about it, due to those feelings of responsibility and 'How are we ever supposed to have a garden?' Oh well, the garden has only ever been theoretical--maybe because of the animals, who are always in it, or maybe not.
Michael is back to focusing more on his practice again. We are excited about bringing in a new acupuncturist to work with him, and we're hoping things pick up a bit soon. That would be a very good thing to happen in the near future!
Monday, October 25, 2010
Nightshade Success
Just thought I'd post an update on the nightshade elimination. 11 days now, including the ketchup day. The finger joints are not achy, and the right wrist seems fine, but the left wrist is chronically sore. I believe that's due to injuries, but I was hoping that perhaps reduced inflammation in the area would lead to complete recuperation (and I still rather think that's possible).
We're having dinner with friends on Wednesday, so I may end my elimination early, as I can hardly ask folks to cook vegetarian and without nightshades (and wheat and dairy). Nope, we have to bend a bit to have any sort of social life!
So, I readily admit that joint inflammation is something that can come and go. This was a good test run, though, so I'll try it again if the rheumatoid symptoms crop back up, and I may generally try to substitute other veggies a bit more in my cooking.
We're having dinner with friends on Wednesday, so I may end my elimination early, as I can hardly ask folks to cook vegetarian and without nightshades (and wheat and dairy). Nope, we have to bend a bit to have any sort of social life!
So, I readily admit that joint inflammation is something that can come and go. This was a good test run, though, so I'll try it again if the rheumatoid symptoms crop back up, and I may generally try to substitute other veggies a bit more in my cooking.
Friday, October 22, 2010
A Revolutionary War Anecdote and Surname Tidbits
I went back into my genealogical files over the last couple of days to review some family history (a primary inspiration source for my books) and of course got completely sidetracked. In my perusals, I was reminded that Alexander actually is one of my ancestral surnames, so I have a distant claim to the name! That was nice to see, though my pen name is really about my favorite author, Lloyd Alexander. As a pre-teen, I had a wonderfully sweet dream that he was my father, and the feeling has always stuck, so I'm his literary daughter of sorts, even if I'm writing in a completely different genre.
I was delighted to find a history of the Williamsburg Church (Presbyterian) online. Chatham county libraries provide us with access to the Heritage Quest Online database, whose content seems to vary, honestly, as I've seen books come and go from there, I believe. Anyhow, this 1856 discourse talked about the history of the county and particularly the church. Not a lot about my direct ancestors, but there was a fascinating little Revolutionary War anecdote about my possible great-great-great-great-great grandfather, George Gamble (great-grandfather of a main character of Silk).
Little George Gamble's folks were unfortunate enough to own a plantation home along the Black River, directly in the path of a British force led by Maj. Wemyss. Wemyss' troops had been directed to burn down the homes of important Whigs in the area and to destroy their food stores.
Well, as the soldiers were feeding the fire at little George's home, they threw in his child's chair. George repeatedly took it out of the fire, only to have the commanding officer direct it to be thrown back in each time. Finally, George approached him and angrily remonstrated, "It is my chair."
The officer, likely in exasperation, replied, "You ___ little rebel! Keep it!" The ___ apparently held some insulting epithet for the whigs of the time.
Isn't that a fantastic little story? I would never have found it if I hadn't read the obscure little manuscript. I wish the author had mentioned George's parents names, for I don't know those.
Oh, I wrote many moons ago about visiting the Midway Museum and noticing the dresses had been made by a woman with surname Cox, my heroine's surname. Caroline Cox, in my story (though not in real life, to my knowledge), was a seamstress as well. This historic manual tells us that a large faction of folks moved from that area of Williamsburg County to Midway, Liberty County, GA. Apparently many were prone to go back and forth, as, after British troops destroyed their Black River homes, some of them headed back to their Liberty County homes. So, that Cox seamstress may actually be a relation of my own Caroline Cox!
I was delighted to find a history of the Williamsburg Church (Presbyterian) online. Chatham county libraries provide us with access to the Heritage Quest Online database, whose content seems to vary, honestly, as I've seen books come and go from there, I believe. Anyhow, this 1856 discourse talked about the history of the county and particularly the church. Not a lot about my direct ancestors, but there was a fascinating little Revolutionary War anecdote about my possible great-great-great-great-great grandfather, George Gamble (great-grandfather of a main character of Silk).
Little George Gamble's folks were unfortunate enough to own a plantation home along the Black River, directly in the path of a British force led by Maj. Wemyss. Wemyss' troops had been directed to burn down the homes of important Whigs in the area and to destroy their food stores.
Well, as the soldiers were feeding the fire at little George's home, they threw in his child's chair. George repeatedly took it out of the fire, only to have the commanding officer direct it to be thrown back in each time. Finally, George approached him and angrily remonstrated, "It is my chair."
The officer, likely in exasperation, replied, "You ___ little rebel! Keep it!" The ___ apparently held some insulting epithet for the whigs of the time.
Isn't that a fantastic little story? I would never have found it if I hadn't read the obscure little manuscript. I wish the author had mentioned George's parents names, for I don't know those.
Oh, I wrote many moons ago about visiting the Midway Museum and noticing the dresses had been made by a woman with surname Cox, my heroine's surname. Caroline Cox, in my story (though not in real life, to my knowledge), was a seamstress as well. This historic manual tells us that a large faction of folks moved from that area of Williamsburg County to Midway, Liberty County, GA. Apparently many were prone to go back and forth, as, after British troops destroyed their Black River homes, some of them headed back to their Liberty County homes. So, that Cox seamstress may actually be a relation of my own Caroline Cox!
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Rowling Rules!
Wow...I just read 'A Single Mother's Manifesto' by JK Rowling, as submitted to The Times (a British paper?). It's a short political piece arguing against new conservative, pro-family measures being implemented by the Tory party. That an author could give me a thrill and inspire me with just her political writing causes me to again bow to her greatness. Her political viewpoint is not even one I would necessarily have cared about before reading it, so it's not that she was simply saying what I wanted to hear. It's how she says it.
Rowling is a brilliant author. I was actually looking to see if any more books are out by her and saw this link. I heard that she's writing books for adults now.
Oh, yeah, I don't even know what that means anymore. It really is irksome that 'adult' has such awful connotations. I struggle to find the words to describe certain materials and end up with 'for grown-ups' (still questionable). 'Mature' and basically any other reference to books written for those in the age of majority have that inference. Euphemisms have taken over so that we can't even communicate anymore, for I don't know if Rowling is writing smut or not! Actually, I didn't find the pen name that she is supposedly writing under now, so she may not be writing the 'books for adults' that I heard about anyway.
Rowling is a brilliant author. I was actually looking to see if any more books are out by her and saw this link. I heard that she's writing books for adults now.
Oh, yeah, I don't even know what that means anymore. It really is irksome that 'adult' has such awful connotations. I struggle to find the words to describe certain materials and end up with 'for grown-ups' (still questionable). 'Mature' and basically any other reference to books written for those in the age of majority have that inference. Euphemisms have taken over so that we can't even communicate anymore, for I don't know if Rowling is writing smut or not! Actually, I didn't find the pen name that she is supposedly writing under now, so she may not be writing the 'books for adults' that I heard about anyway.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Publishing Blues & Jazzy '20s
Wow, the whole process of trying to ready a book for publication is a drag. It's tedious and amorphic and discouraging.
Well, that's how I feel at this moment, anyhow.
A couple of days ago I was utterly thrilled to be making progress, as I had a breakthrough with a cover idea, which I'm still inclined to go with, though I'm going to play with fonts a bit and tweak a little more.
I'm also fairly jonesing to start book #2. I've been a bit nervous about dealing with the 1920's, but I have a fabulous book, Fashions of the Roaring '20s, which has inspired me greatly. I'm infatuated with it all--the clothes, the shoes, even the hair. It may be the first time in my life I've ever even momentarily wanted short hair!
I really want to pull together Silk first, though. Yep, that's the name. Oh, and my pen name is Sophia Alexander. It can feel so personal to write a novel at first, but now that I look back on it, I can't clearly see anything but a story there. No single character represents any single person I know. Lots of tidbits from lots of people. Even the heroine isn't me. Or she is, but so are many of the other characters. One crazy old woman is part Yoda, I think--at least, afterwards that's the correlation I make. So, it's just a story, and, while I put lots of feeling and emotion into it, that's all it is, and I don't mind sharing. Don't read too much into it. I think certain elements of life are universal, so hopefully you and everyone else will associate with the story and feel moved by it. That's the point, like all art.
Yes, I'm still going with the pen name, though. I can't imagine how annoying it must be for famous authors to not be able to give their name or use their credit card without having everyone react. And the poor families... So, assuming all will go well and my stories will top the bestseller lists, I won't be able to change my name then, so here's for optimistic, self-manifesting planning! (See, even I can be an optimist at times!)
Well, that's how I feel at this moment, anyhow.
A couple of days ago I was utterly thrilled to be making progress, as I had a breakthrough with a cover idea, which I'm still inclined to go with, though I'm going to play with fonts a bit and tweak a little more.
I'm also fairly jonesing to start book #2. I've been a bit nervous about dealing with the 1920's, but I have a fabulous book, Fashions of the Roaring '20s, which has inspired me greatly. I'm infatuated with it all--the clothes, the shoes, even the hair. It may be the first time in my life I've ever even momentarily wanted short hair!
I really want to pull together Silk first, though. Yep, that's the name. Oh, and my pen name is Sophia Alexander. It can feel so personal to write a novel at first, but now that I look back on it, I can't clearly see anything but a story there. No single character represents any single person I know. Lots of tidbits from lots of people. Even the heroine isn't me. Or she is, but so are many of the other characters. One crazy old woman is part Yoda, I think--at least, afterwards that's the correlation I make. So, it's just a story, and, while I put lots of feeling and emotion into it, that's all it is, and I don't mind sharing. Don't read too much into it. I think certain elements of life are universal, so hopefully you and everyone else will associate with the story and feel moved by it. That's the point, like all art.
Yes, I'm still going with the pen name, though. I can't imagine how annoying it must be for famous authors to not be able to give their name or use their credit card without having everyone react. And the poor families... So, assuming all will go well and my stories will top the bestseller lists, I won't be able to change my name then, so here's for optimistic, self-manifesting planning! (See, even I can be an optimist at times!)
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Get Some Compliance Already!
Crud! So, I'm trying to do this nightshade elimination thing, and I realize yesterday that I had soup with powdered chili pepper in it. Oops...
This morning, Fiona had ketchup with her eggs...and then so did I. Didn't even occur to me for six whole hours.
At least, from what I've read, the nightshade thing is particularly dose dependent, so these should be minor setbacks compared to my normal, big tomato and potato-featured dishes. My hands are not at their worst today, but they aren't completely okay, either. We'll see how things go from here.
This morning, Fiona had ketchup with her eggs...and then so did I. Didn't even occur to me for six whole hours.
At least, from what I've read, the nightshade thing is particularly dose dependent, so these should be minor setbacks compared to my normal, big tomato and potato-featured dishes. My hands are not at their worst today, but they aren't completely okay, either. We'll see how things go from here.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Forget Balance!
Okay, WebMD made up a bit with me. A new article touts the 30-day 110% obsession on a creative project idea. As I've experienced it first-hand with my first novel, I'm a big fan of the idea and am gearing up to jump into a 30-day novel #2, so I appreciate the encouragement. This is still pending finishing my edit on book 1 (soon, soon I hope!).
Also, utterly contrary to the whole 'balance' idea, I'm beginning a 3-week Nightshade elimination today to see if that helps with my poor little wrists and hands. I'm suspecting the beginning stages of rheumatoid arthritis. If I want to write, I'd best nip that in the bud. I'll let you know if the elimination helps. I'm going to miss my potatoes and tomatoes desperately!
Also, utterly contrary to the whole 'balance' idea, I'm beginning a 3-week Nightshade elimination today to see if that helps with my poor little wrists and hands. I'm suspecting the beginning stages of rheumatoid arthritis. If I want to write, I'd best nip that in the bud. I'll let you know if the elimination helps. I'm going to miss my potatoes and tomatoes desperately!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Time to ditch WebMD?
Wow...I've known for years that WebMD has many biased articles that I strongly, strongly disagree with. For example, they'll report something like, "Selenium no good for heart attacks" and have some ridiculous study about it, when noone even uses it for heart attacks!
In just the last couple of minutes, I've watched a WebMD slideshow on how bust size matters, curious to see what objective scientific findings there were--only to hear an infomercial on breast enhancement surgeries, couched in 'this is what Americans want' and absolutely no objective science. Then, I immediately went to an article on lifestyle changes helping obese folks to lose weight--actually a subtle ad for weight loss surgery, saying, "sometimes diet and exercise actually do help" and the surgery can be avoided! Unbelievable!
They routinely bash natural therapies so flagrantly that I only trust the pro-natural therapy articles, knowing there's no way they'd publish them if they weren't true and pretty significant (though often they try to slyly argue against them in the article). And, realist that I am, I know they publish these articles entirely so they won't be accused of bias. Sometimes those articles are really great, though.
I bet you can guess who the sponsors of WebMD are! Too bad...I'm just blustering, as I like to peruse WebMD for the occasional useful new tidbit of health information. I'm just glad I'm a skeptic...
In just the last couple of minutes, I've watched a WebMD slideshow on how bust size matters, curious to see what objective scientific findings there were--only to hear an infomercial on breast enhancement surgeries, couched in 'this is what Americans want' and absolutely no objective science. Then, I immediately went to an article on lifestyle changes helping obese folks to lose weight--actually a subtle ad for weight loss surgery, saying, "sometimes diet and exercise actually do help" and the surgery can be avoided! Unbelievable!
They routinely bash natural therapies so flagrantly that I only trust the pro-natural therapy articles, knowing there's no way they'd publish them if they weren't true and pretty significant (though often they try to slyly argue against them in the article). And, realist that I am, I know they publish these articles entirely so they won't be accused of bias. Sometimes those articles are really great, though.
I bet you can guess who the sponsors of WebMD are! Too bad...I'm just blustering, as I like to peruse WebMD for the occasional useful new tidbit of health information. I'm just glad I'm a skeptic...
Introverted in an Extraverted Society
Caveat: I want to make clear that I am not equating introversion with intelligence--it's just a different way of existing. Many extraverts are incredibly intelligent, of course! And there's a whole intelligence in itself of having the ability to quickly process and absorb multiple stimuli at once. It can be quite phenomenal, actually! That said...
I've been thinking a lot lately about the Introvert vs Extravert situation, especially after reading a fabulous article in Psychology Today that struck a chord.
Why the article struck a chord has become more apparent to me in the time since I read it several days ago. The author discusses the societal pressure for us to become extraverts, and I've realized how even traditionally 'introverted' activities are now evolving into more extraverted ones (like writing--they tell us there are oodles of great authors out there, so we have to market and sell ourselves!), and I have just read yet another article that twists the whole situation to make us introverts feel yet worse about ourselves.
WebMD reports frequently on surveys to figure out who the 'happiest' folks are. They report cheerily that Extraverts, believe it or not, are the happiest people. So, they conclude, we should all strive to be more extraverted. To me, this is fairly equivalent to telling me that optimists are more cheerful. Duh! It's a bit more cloaked, though, so it sneaks past our normally healthy realism (i.e. "pessimism") and gets to our self-esteem. What evil optimists abound! Or are they near-sighted, self-loathing pessimists?
What I appreciate about Professor Laurie Helgoe's article is that she points out that we have an innate state, which is of course not all-or-nothing. When heavily-leaning introverts strive to be extraverted, it comes at great cost. While extraverts may be naturally happier and more suited to extraverted activities, the introverts are even more anxious or depressed when they try to force these situations upon themselves. What works best for them is to identify their natural state and embrace it.
I'm so glad I happened across that article, as I hadn't really processed how much pressure that our society, an extravert-loving society, puts on realists and introverts. When introverts embrace their natural state (which is not necessarily shyness), they can then achieve greater happiness naturally, without so many societal head games.
Sidenote: I've often thought to myself that Facebook is like a party for introverts! We can take our time to process and remain in our own little bubbles! But it doesn't exclude the extraverts, of course!
Sidenote #2: Helgoe doesn't bring it up, but I'm wondering about alcohol converting introverts to extraverts. I've known many to say they can't really relax and have fun until they've had a bit of alcohol, and I know my introverted tendencies quickly fall away with my rare consumption of alcohol. I'm wondering about it subduing our receptors, so that we're not so 'over'-stimulated and 'over'-thinking. Helgoe describes some of the elaborate thought processes an introvert generates in a simple conversation. Alcohol subdues so much thought, which frees us to 'party' a bit more and 'worry' less--and, quite frankly, 'dumbs us down' (true for everyone with alcohol, I think!). Hmm, wonder if the rate of alcoholism is greater among introverts? It'd be attractive, especially with the naturally 'happier' extraverted state!
Monday, October 11, 2010
Jeff & Seresa Kelly--Married at Last!
My brother-in-law and his long-time girlfriend finally got officially hitched on Saturday. The kids can now call her 'Aunt Reese' (well, they have been for a while!), and maybe we'll get some little nieces and nephews before long.
The wedding and reception were very nice, and the bride was radiant. It was nice to finally meet so many of her family members after hearing about them for years. Her mother and sisters travelled from Colorado, and I believe her grandfather came up from Mexico! He seemed to be quite the character.
Jeff had his possey of long-time friends--mostly frat brothers--and family members present, of course.
I was happy to be asked to fix all the junior bridesmaids' hair into a 'veil'--very simple but pretty. I fixed Fiona's hair the same way, as she was the flower girl. Michael was best man, and he looked dashing in his tuxedo!
The wedding and reception were very nice, and the bride was radiant. It was nice to finally meet so many of her family members after hearing about them for years. Her mother and sisters travelled from Colorado, and I believe her grandfather came up from Mexico! He seemed to be quite the character.
Jeff had his possey of long-time friends--mostly frat brothers--and family members present, of course.
I was happy to be asked to fix all the junior bridesmaids' hair into a 'veil'--very simple but pretty. I fixed Fiona's hair the same way, as she was the flower girl. Michael was best man, and he looked dashing in his tuxedo!
Friday, October 8, 2010
My Best Friend is CREEPY!!!
Yes, she is. I am utterly thrilled about it, as I have had the huge honor of returning the editing favor and reading a couple of her short stories--genre horror. I was completely riveted at the first line. Truly. I would share, but the stories are not mine to share! Keep in tune, and I'll let you know the details when her stories hit the market, which they definitely need to do. Move over Poe!
Thursday, October 7, 2010
He is my Handyman Hero
Michael is a handyman super-hero! He has repaired a broken stove and replaced a fuel pump on my car this week, in addition to working his regular acupuncture job. Oh, he replaced a handle on my compost bin, too! He's been working on this idea for a backyard well, too...
I should keep a running tab of the innumerable things he does! It's fairly phenomenal, between computers and household repairs and writing books (yes, he finished his, too!). He does the taxes and does heaps of laundry and grills out...
I won't even go into all the sweet little things he does for me and the kids! Anyhow, I'm elated that he was able to replace the fuel pump in the same evening that the car broke down, for only a fraction of the cost. And how do other people afford all those handyman services? Hurrah for my uber-competent hubby! Mwah!
Oh yeah, emphasis on my. I know he's super-competent, and I know you might like a handyman hero for yourself, but I keep him super-busy with a zillion tasks. No sharing! (Caveat: Close family may get occasional favors!)
I should keep a running tab of the innumerable things he does! It's fairly phenomenal, between computers and household repairs and writing books (yes, he finished his, too!). He does the taxes and does heaps of laundry and grills out...
I won't even go into all the sweet little things he does for me and the kids! Anyhow, I'm elated that he was able to replace the fuel pump in the same evening that the car broke down, for only a fraction of the cost. And how do other people afford all those handyman services? Hurrah for my uber-competent hubby! Mwah!
Oh yeah, emphasis on my. I know he's super-competent, and I know you might like a handyman hero for yourself, but I keep him super-busy with a zillion tasks. No sharing! (Caveat: Close family may get occasional favors!)
Mine!
I just spent a good little chunk of time doing something rather silly...I affixed the 'Movie' tab to my Facebook page and added a bunch of movies that I love as 'Favorites'! I've also enjoyed, over the past year or more, the 'WeRead' feature, where I list and review books I've read. The purpose? No, not to persuade others to read or watch these things. It's ownership! I LIKE listing these things on MY page. I've definitely felt a reduced urge to buy all the books I've ever liked since joining WeRead. For, when I'm feeling nostalgic or want to peruse, I can just flip through my convenient list on-line, and it's even more organized and convenient than perusing my bookshelves. Likewise, I keep wanting to purchase movies I've seen and loved, even though, like my books, I can get them at the library. So, in an effort to satisfy my greedy little heart, I am 'owning' these movies on my FB page on-line!
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Scribbling!
Oh, the joy! I have been reveling in positive feedback from my lovely 'editor' on my novel, and I think that has to be the very best possible aspect of being an author! To be told that my writing has caused her to become a 'vested participant' and not just a 'passive observer' is the intellectual equivalent of my first reader getting goosebumps while talking about a creepy part of the book!
So, yeah, it's a select audience. My dearest friends may be more inclined to like my book and give me positive feedback--but heck, I'm good with that!
Back to editing the last little bit today, and I hope to finish with this go-through today. I now have hope of actually becoming a published, even successful author! That translates into a seriously swollen head! :)
So, yeah, it's a select audience. My dearest friends may be more inclined to like my book and give me positive feedback--but heck, I'm good with that!
Back to editing the last little bit today, and I hope to finish with this go-through today. I now have hope of actually becoming a published, even successful author! That translates into a seriously swollen head! :)
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Farcical Shopping
So, I head out to the Food Lion last night to do some quick shopping. As I'm checking out, the woman behind me has dog food and I remember that I also need some rabbit food. After putting my stuff in my car, I return for a meager bag of rabbit pellets and another bag of sunflower seeds (for the chickens and rabbits) and get in line behind two other women.
Luckily, I was not in a hurry, because the first woman had a huge buggy-full and was a coupon shopper. The unfriendly cashier scrutinized each coupon, and several inquiries with the manager and trips to get another bottle of something entailed. The poor coupon lady mouthed "I'm sorry!" at us in line behind her, and I felt for her being treated a bit like a criminal!
It wasn't so bad, as I got to read some interesting magazine headlines. I wasn't aware that Mel Gibson had a recent meltdown, and Celebrity Magazine had a very flattering feature of Angelina Jolie... The best entertainment, though, was watching the show right in front of me!
When the coupon lady finished, the older woman right in front of me rang up her few items, and she swiped her debit card. The pin didn't go through, so she swiped another...and another...and another. She finally apologized, left the pile of groceries, and left the store!
Meanwhile, the cashier is minimally communicative and looks totally irked. She had already been that way, as the 'coupon lady' was actually the dog food lady, too, and the cashier had murmured 'Just kill me now' when the huge cartload approached the register...
Hmm, I think there was a comedy about some young folks working retail, with just this sort of thing...I'll have to find it...having had my own funny preview last night!
Luckily, I was not in a hurry, because the first woman had a huge buggy-full and was a coupon shopper. The unfriendly cashier scrutinized each coupon, and several inquiries with the manager and trips to get another bottle of something entailed. The poor coupon lady mouthed "I'm sorry!" at us in line behind her, and I felt for her being treated a bit like a criminal!
It wasn't so bad, as I got to read some interesting magazine headlines. I wasn't aware that Mel Gibson had a recent meltdown, and Celebrity Magazine had a very flattering feature of Angelina Jolie... The best entertainment, though, was watching the show right in front of me!
When the coupon lady finished, the older woman right in front of me rang up her few items, and she swiped her debit card. The pin didn't go through, so she swiped another...and another...and another. She finally apologized, left the pile of groceries, and left the store!
Meanwhile, the cashier is minimally communicative and looks totally irked. She had already been that way, as the 'coupon lady' was actually the dog food lady, too, and the cashier had murmured 'Just kill me now' when the huge cartload approached the register...
Hmm, I think there was a comedy about some young folks working retail, with just this sort of thing...I'll have to find it...having had my own funny preview last night!
Cares of our World
Enlarging our world via the News has always had its drawbacks, and I've known folks who quit watching and reading the news because it was so heartbreaking and disturbing to see what was going on in our world. I've had that feeling myself a bit, and I go through a lot of news-free phases. (Sidenote: So, if something huge is going on in my local vicinity that I should know about, be aware that I am possibly clueless!).
Of course, that's random news and events, and I've often thought that I'd really not know about heinous murders in Texas or floods in Louisiana or whatever. Why worry about something completely unrelated to me, that I have no power to help?
I'm finding that Facebook is having a somewhat similar impact these days, and I am trying to formulate my reaction... On one hand, I am so grateful to know when things are tough for old friends. It's always bothered me to know that big life events are occurring for old friends that I'm out of touch with, and I have no clue. So, I'm glad to hear even of sad events, for I do want to know.
Sometimes, however, I find that the posts are incredibly sad, and there's often a touch of that 'helpless' feeling that goes with the regular newscast. An old friend who lives far away and hasn't heard from you in ages, or perhaps a local friend who you very much like but is already swamped with family and friends and you were never really very close--these folks elicit my care and concern, but I feel out of place and inappropriate in doing much more than saying a few words of respect and support.
I suppose my intent is simply to recognize the 'other' side of keeping in touch. You end up catching a lot of meaningful, personal sad news that you otherwise would have no clue about, and it can be a little frustrating, since, if you wouldn't have known to begin with, it can feel entirely inappropriate to make a to-do about it for friends who aren't currently very close.
I am glad to be abreast of life events for my old friends, but I find myself saddened and feeling a bit helpless quite often. I suppose that we should just be glad that we can say our words of condolences, and perhaps at a later point we will hear more joyous tidings. Like the world news, it's good to keep updated, but there's an inherent issue with getting a lot more upsetting information than you would otherwise receive.
Ah, what's that I hear? Balance, again! Yep, my perpetual issue... So, in this case, stay informed, but keep your perspective and don't get bogged down with all the cares of the world or even my own Facebook world.
Of course, that's random news and events, and I've often thought that I'd really not know about heinous murders in Texas or floods in Louisiana or whatever. Why worry about something completely unrelated to me, that I have no power to help?
I'm finding that Facebook is having a somewhat similar impact these days, and I am trying to formulate my reaction... On one hand, I am so grateful to know when things are tough for old friends. It's always bothered me to know that big life events are occurring for old friends that I'm out of touch with, and I have no clue. So, I'm glad to hear even of sad events, for I do want to know.
Sometimes, however, I find that the posts are incredibly sad, and there's often a touch of that 'helpless' feeling that goes with the regular newscast. An old friend who lives far away and hasn't heard from you in ages, or perhaps a local friend who you very much like but is already swamped with family and friends and you were never really very close--these folks elicit my care and concern, but I feel out of place and inappropriate in doing much more than saying a few words of respect and support.
I suppose my intent is simply to recognize the 'other' side of keeping in touch. You end up catching a lot of meaningful, personal sad news that you otherwise would have no clue about, and it can be a little frustrating, since, if you wouldn't have known to begin with, it can feel entirely inappropriate to make a to-do about it for friends who aren't currently very close.
I am glad to be abreast of life events for my old friends, but I find myself saddened and feeling a bit helpless quite often. I suppose that we should just be glad that we can say our words of condolences, and perhaps at a later point we will hear more joyous tidings. Like the world news, it's good to keep updated, but there's an inherent issue with getting a lot more upsetting information than you would otherwise receive.
Ah, what's that I hear? Balance, again! Yep, my perpetual issue... So, in this case, stay informed, but keep your perspective and don't get bogged down with all the cares of the world or even my own Facebook world.
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